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Tuesday, April 19, 2011

A Day in the Life

(While I am lounging at the beach, my blog administrator (aka Carey) is holding down the fort.  I wrote this post on a beautiful September day in 2008.)


Early this morning (between breakfast #1 and breakfast #2 and before tipping over the very full #!%&* garbage can on the way to the curb) I printed out the forms required for new patients by the new dentist. Yes, the same dentist I couldn't find last week. Today I planned to be prepared. Organized. Ready. Armed.

You so know it didn't happen. Not in a million years did it happen.

It went down like this:
Getting ready to sit down and fill out stupid forms, notice out of the corner of my eye that dog is tangled up (yet again) on her long, long lead in the backyard. I step outside and start talking to her about what a dork she is and how she will love it when we finally get the invisible fence installed (planned to finish yesterday, but got distracted when an enormous bug chomped on my hand, wouldn't let go and then left me with numbness up to my elbow and a hand the size of, of...something big and owie and swollen), when I notice that the next door neighbor is out sweeping her deck and listening to me chat with my dog. I untangleMolly , which requires unhooking her from her lead, and step to the fence to visit. We commiserate about half-finished home projects while Molly romps around the yard, and all the while I'm thinking about my wet hair and the stupid, stupid forms. I go to excuse myself and notice...you guessed it, the dog is gone. I am instantly terrified because this dog has a squirrel fixation that could easily lead her out into the traffic of the busy street nearby. I picture myself crying and explain to the unforgiving children exactly why I let her off her lead. Neighbor and I go on a Molly hunt, which lasts just long enough for my hair to dry in a lovely, stay-at-home-mom-who-has-let-herself-go fashion, and find her waaay down the street, rolling around in someone's backyard. She comes joyfully to me when called (like it's any other day and I don't need to redeem myself in the eyes of the new dentist), and as she trots up I notice a smell. Make that a Smell. Miss I Just Had A Bath Yesterday has rolled in something that has not been living for quite some time. And I'm supposed to picking up Bubba right.now.

You can imagine the rest: we arrive at the dentist's office late, forms incomplete (heck, forms not even started), and I don't even bother to apologize. This is my life, and they will just have to learn to deal.

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